Thursday, July 21, 2011

Paradise Letters to Beatrice: Money, Dreams, True Love Waits

Dear Beatrice,

As we have struggled to keep Hibbleton alive despite making no money, one thing I have noticed is that it is very difficult to get people in America to volunteer their time, skills, and resources into something that will not bring them financial gain, even if what they are giving and getting is meaningful and important.

I wish people could see the rewards beside money—the satisfaction of giving to their community, of creating something beautiful, of helping others. Americans are hard-wired to see money, cash, as the ultimate goal of their efforts and time. How can I help people see beyond this paradigm?

Sincerely,

Jesse

Dear Beatrice,

I sit in the CSUF cafeteria, eating a bean and cheese burrito, watching students rushing about and eating and talking. I watch these young people and I wonder what they will do with their lives. Will they be ordinary or extraordinary? Will they take the safe road—boring job, family, house? Or will they take the more difficult road into unknown territory? Will they follow their childhood dreams, or let themselves be pressed into a boring mold? They are at such an important age, these young people, when they can choose the path of their lives. I wonder—what will they choose?

Sincerely,

Jesse

Dear Beatrice,

When I was growing up in the church, I often heard the term “true love waits.” This meant that you should wait until marriage before having sex. Because of this pressure to stifle sexual urges, lots of people in church got married really young, way younger than the average Amerian, so they could have sex and not feel guilty.

One of the problems of getting married young is that you don’t have time to find your true passion and direction in life. Being single in my 20s allowed me to discover my true passions. Once you get married, and have kids, the priority is getting a job that pays the bills, not one that actually matters to you.

I would propose an alternative meaning to this term “true love waits.” I think it’s better to be true to your personal true love, your passion, before getting married. It’s better to wait to get married so as not to stifle your dreams. If that means having pre-marital sex—so be it. There are worse things in the world, like working a life-destroying corporate job. What’s worse: guilt (over having some sex), or emptiness (over working a job that does not satisfy your hearts true passion)?

Sincerely,

Jesse